Things To Do This Week In London: 14

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Things To Do This Week is sponsored by London Transport Museum.

TOTTENHAM LITERATURE FESTIVAL: Celebrating diverse stories by Black authors, poets, and artists from Tottenham and beyond, Tottenham Literature Festival is a mixture of in-person and online events. Talks, workshops and panel discussions with special guests including Anthony Joseph, Bridget Minamore, Dean Atta and Dzifa Benson. 14-23 November

ELF THE MUSICAL: Santa! I know him! If you can identify that quote, you need to get yourself to the Dominion Theatre to see Elf! The Musical. For those not familiar (what!?), it's the story of Buddy, who was mistakenly raised as one of Santa's elves, despite being significantly taller than his colleagues. We've got a feeling this one will be as popular with adults as kids. 14 November 2022-7 January 2023

EFG LONDON JAZZ FESTIVAL: There's an absolute wealth of events going on all over town as this year's EFG London Jazz Festival enters its final week. The Simon Woolf Quintet, Barb Jungr, Matt Ridley and Jon Onabowu are just a small selection of the performers on the line-up. Until 20 November

LONDONERS UNDERGROUND: Have you seen Londoners Underground: Private Worlds in Public Places yet? It's a free exhibition at Barbican of photos of Londoners taking the tube. The images were taken over a five-year period and capture the experience of negotiating a city of eight million strangers. FREE, until 23 November

ICE RINKS OPEN: It's the best week of the year for ice skaters, as several of London's seasonal rinks open. Somerset House, Hampton Court, Queen's House Greenwich and Hyde Park rinks open this week, with venues at Canary Wharf and Battersea Power Station already up and running. See you on the ice!

JUBILEE EXHIBITION: Only a couple more weeks to see the Jubilee Exhibition at St Paul's Cathedral. It opened this year to celebrate the Queen's Platinum Jubilee, before her death, and looks at the grand ceremonial occasions held at the Cathedral to commemorate the Royal Jubilees of four British monarchs: George III, Victoria, George V and Elizabeth II. Until 1 December

MUSEUM OF LONDON: A reminder that time is running out to visit the Museum of London at its current London Wall home, before it closes for a significant period of time while it moves to its new home. FREE, until 4 December

DANNY FOX: Hailing from St Ives in Cornwall, Danny Fox's paintings are inspired by the likes of Ben Nicholson and Alfred Wallis, and portray unlikely 21st century heroes, from cult leaders to lotharios to false prophets. His new work is currently on display at Saatchi Yates. FREE, until 26 January 2023

GUN SALUTE: Today is King Charles III's birthday so, as is customary, we're expecting a gun salute in Green Park, and likely also at the Tower of London, though this hasn't been confirmed. FREE, noon

BRIT FLOYD: Catch Pink Floyd tribute act Brit Floyd at Cadogan Hall two nights this week. This new production includes highlights from The Wall, The Dark Side of the Moon, Wish You Were Here, Animals and The Division Bell albums. 14-15 November

CIVIL WAR STORY: As part of The London History Festival 2022, author Jessie Childs is at Kensington Central Library to discuss her book The Siege of Loyalty House: A Civil War Story. It portrays the siege of Basing House, which took place in the civil wars of the 17th century at a royalist stronghold. 6.30pm-7.30pm

GARRETT MILLERICK: Described as the "world's angriest optimist", comedian Garrett Millerick performs his show Just Trying To Help at Soho Theatre. It's a chaotic look at the unintended consequences of doing our best. 7.15pm (until Wednesday)

HAPPY MONDAYS: Laugh off those Monday blues at the Amersham Arms in New Cross, where tonight's Happy Mondays line up features Edinburgh Comedy Award-nominated Carl Donnelly, John Smith (back from an extended comedy sabbatical), and Hawaiian-born Margaret De Caires, with stories about swapping one kind of island life for another. 8pm

END OF THE LINE: Footprints of London tour guide Jane Parker leads a guided walk around the Kensington Olympia area, with particular focus on the District line station. Hear about the station's history, and how its fortunes have been linked to the Olympia London exhibition halls nearby, as well as visiting local back streets and hearing about parks, pubs, music, museums and more. 11am-1pm

HOLLY JOLLY: Bloomsbury's Brunswick Centre welcomes stilt walkers, Disney characters, magicians, balloon modellers and other fun figures, for Holly Jolly Brunswick. There's also face painting and (if you're ready) Christmas songs. FREE, 4.30pm-8.30pm

GLORIANA: Linda Collins and Siobhan Clarke are the co-authors of new book Gloriana: Elizabeth I & the Art of Queenship, and tonight there's a chance to hear from them about key artworks from Elizabeth I's reign which were used as propaganda to portray her royal magnificence. 6.30pm-7.30pm

HISTORY OF WAR: Stanfords in Covent Garden hosts Philip Parker to talk about his new book, History of War in Maps. It contains more than 70 historical maps, telling the story of war from ancient conflicts to modern warfare. 6.30pm-8pm

POLARI PRIZE: Head to the British Library for the announcement of this year's Polari Prize winners, with some live music thrown in too. It's the UK's only book award for LGBTQ+ writing and has three categories: debut, non-debut and children's/YA book. 7pm-8.30pm

ABOUT US: Head to the Tower of London for free outdoor show, About Us. It's a family-friendly light show with projections, music and poetry looking at the universe, and how we connect to everything around us. FREE, every half hour 5.30pm-9pm, 16-19 November

HACKNEY REVEALED: New illuminated arts festival Hackney Revealed launches today. 250 local people collaborated with 12 professional artists to create installations which will be on display both inside and outside local buildings, including Hackney Town Hall, St Augustine's Tower, Hackney Church and Sutton House. FREE, 16 November-8 December

CHRISTMAS AT KEW: We know we shouldn't have favourites, but we have a real soft spot for Christmas at Kew, the spectacular light and illuminations festival that takes over the gardens again from tonight. Over a million lights and thousands of laser beams go into the event, which also features a fire garden, light tunnel and illuminated trees. It tends to sell out every year, so be quick if you want tickets. 16 November 2022-8 January 2023

FREE BEER: Fancy a free tinny? All you've got to do is take along some unwanted clothes to Camden Beer Hall today between noon and 4pm. Camden Town Brewery will be dishing out its new cold IPA, called Chilly, in exchange for your former glad rags, which will be redistributed by the charity TRAID.

LANTERN PARADE: A lantern parade takes place through Greenwich Market, involving children from five local schools and their handmade lanterns, culminating in the market's Christmas lights switch-on. FREE, 4pm-6pm

IT'S A SIN: Ahead of World AIDS Day, watch an episode of critically acclaimed mini-series It's A Sin, which follows the lives of five friends growing up in the shadow of AIDS. Actor and AIDS activist Nathaniel Hall, who plays Donald in the show, joins Crick HIV researcher Paula Ordonez Suarez and other leading experts for a pre-screening discussion about some of the show's themes. Takes place at the Crick in King's Cross. FREE, 6pm-10pm (sponsor)

SING LIKE A VAGABOND: Historian Oskar Jensen and 'singer of forgotten songs' Patricia Hammond combine for an exploration of what it meant to sing on the streets of Victorian London. Hear stories of the city's ballad singers, covering executions, romance and death, and take part in creating your own cry. 7pm

NERD NITE: Get your geek on at Nerd Nite London's November event, at The Backyard Comedy Club in Bethnal Green. It brings together three speakers, each giving a short (around 20 minutes) talk on their area of expertise — this month, learn about Antarctica, Alfred Hitchcock, and the @ symbol. Proceeds go to charity. 7pm

PHILIPPA GREGORY: Historical novelist Philippa Gregory — best-known for The Other Boleyn Girl — is at the National Archives ahead of the publication of her new novel, Dawnlands. In this special event, she discusses the historical inspiration behind her novels, and tells little-known stories of political intrigue, rebellion and scandal. 7.30pm

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Up for a subterranean adventure that'll shake up how you view the city? Then get yourself a ticket to one of London Transport Museum's exclusive Hidden London tours. These fascinating events allow you to explore parts of the tube network that are usually off-limits to the public — from disused Victorian tunnels to a secret wartime HQ.

Go behind the scenes at bustling stations like Shepherd's Bush and Charing Cross - at the latter, you'll get to walk under Trafalgar Square and explore disused platforms that have cameo'd in blockbusters such as Skyfall and Thor: The Dark World. Alternatively, you can explore 'abandoned' stations like Aldwych - another popular filming location, featured in the likes of Atonement and Sherlock - and Down Street, which was the Railway Executive Committee's headquarters during the second world war and sheltered Winston Churchill during the Blitz.

This latest batch of Hidden London tours run Wednesday to Sunday from now till mid-late December. Can't make it to the capital? Virtual tours are also available and include a chance to explore intriguing bits of the brand-new Elizabeth Line from your living room. Browse the full programme here and book your tickets while you can.

60 YEARS OF BOND: Celebrate the 60th anniversary of James Bond's first silver screen appearance in suitably spectacular style at the Royal Albert Hall. The iconic venue presents a trio of Bond films in concert across four nights this week, with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra performing the score live to picture. Choose between Casino Royale on Thursday, Skyfall on Friday, or Spectre on Saturday and Sunday. 17-20 November (sponsor)

WINTER ICE FESTIVAL: Canary Wharf's Jubilee Park hosts a three-day Winter Ice Festival. Follow a trail of 15 carved ice sculptures, each representing an endangered bird or animal species, watch ice-sculpting experts at work in front of your eyes, or have a go yourself in a free masterclass. FREE, 17-19 November

LIGHTOPIA CRYSTAL PALACE: Another day, another light festival opens. This time it's Lightopia at Crystal Palace, a trail of large-scale illuminated installations, including a dragon who dramatically breathes 'fire', a magical forest display filled with mythical winged creatures, and an illuminated water show over the lower lake. 17 November 2022-2 January 2023

MAGDALENA ABAKANOWICZ: Tate Modern opens an exhibition dedicated to Polish artist Magdalena Abakanowicz. Wander through a forest-like display of her large-scale woven fibre sculptures inside the gallery's Blavatnik Building. 17 November 2022-1 May 2023

OPEN STUDIOS: Fancy a snoop around some artist studios in central London? Make Space Studios will be open for anyone to visit from 6-9 pm on 17 and 18, and 12-6 pm on 19 November. Take a look behind the scenes, meet the artists and even buy direct from their studious. Find them on Newnham Terrace, London, SE1 7DR. FREE, various times

IMPERIAL LATES: Imperial College stays open late for an evening opening with the theme Tiny Science. Head to the South Kensington campus for talks, stands and workshops, covering topics including microplastics, and the future of the Large Hadron Collider. FREE, 6pm-9pm

CHARITY COMEDY: Jeff Innocent, Stefano Paolini, Hatty Ashdown, James Dowdeswell and Roman Harris are the comedians on the bill at tonight's comedy charity fundraiser at The Rivoli Ballroom in Brockley. Money raised goes to The Working Together Trust, which supports people with disabilities and children in care. Doors 7pm

PARADOXICAL GASP: Hidden Keileon's experimental event Paradoxical Gasp explores the use and effects of tear gas in society, discussing how people's voices are controlled by manipulating the air around them. It's at the Crypt Gallery in Euston till Sunday. 7pm-9pm (tuns till 20 Nov, times differ)

A CINEMATIC SPECTACLE: Bourbon kings Woodford Reserve are bringing a one-night-only food-and-film pairing to Hoxton, where 2022 comedy-horror hit The Menu (young couple visits a remote island for a lavish tasting menu, only to be met with sinister surprises) will be paired with an IRL (but hopefully less horrific) tasting menu and cocktails. Food from Rita's Soho, so that's reason enough to snap up a ticket. 7pm-11pm

HYDE PARK WINTER WONDERLAND: London's giant festive funfair returns to Hyde Park today, with all the usual attractions; ice rink, giant wheel, funfair rides, ice kingdom, circus, Christmas market and food and drink stalls. Note that like last year, you'll need to book your entry slot in advance, and prices vary depending on peak and off-peak timings. 18 November 2022-2 January 2023

ILLUMINATURE: The London Wetlands Centre in Barnes is home to Illuminature, a trail of nature themed sculptures aglow after dark. Follow the route past twinkling lights and giant illuminated sculptures of some of the creatures that call the wetlands home. 18 November 2022-8 January 2023

LIGHT FANTASTIC: Choo choo! All aboard the Epping-Ongar Railway for Light Fantastic, a special ride on a train that's illuminated with countless fairy lights. Once on board, watch the world whizz by the window, with other illuminations to be enjoyed from within the train. 18 November 2022-15 January 2023

A TURBULENT DECADE: Mark Dunton, an expert from the National Archives, talks through 10 different documents which offer an insight into life in Britain in the 1970s. It's a time that's being referenced a lot recently, in relation to news events such as industrial strikes and power cuts, and this is a chance to find out about the bleakness, glamour and social liberalisation of the decade. 2pm

CANDLELIGHT CLUB: Get glammed up for The Candlelight Club's November party. The 1920s themed event takes inspiration from Prohibition-era America, taking the format of a secret speakeasy, with a live jazz band and cabaret performers, at a secret central London location. 7pm (repeated tomorrow)

BIG SWING: Georgina Jackson and Emma Smith lead newly-formed The Big Swing, a band playing both swing classics and fresh material. Tonight they're swinging at Cadogan Hall, with special guests. 7.30pm

JAPANESE MASKS: Take the kids (age 5+) along to the British Museum for a free mask-making workshop. It's inspired by headpieces and other objects from Japan within the museum's collection. Use digital technology to design your mask, then print it off and take it home with you. FREE, 10am-4pm

LONDON FORTEAN SOCIETY: Join London Fortean Society at Holborn's Conway Hall (or online via livestream) for a day of talks and short films about the folklore of Britain and beyond. Highlights include Dr Irving Finkel of the British Museum talking about the earliest ghost stories ever written, and Natural History Museum botanist Roy Vickery on the symbolic importance of plants in folklore. 10am

CHARITY BOOK SALE: Bag yourself a literary bargain at the Amnesty Book Sale, held twice a year by the Blackheath & Greenwich branch of Amnesty International. Rummage through tables of second hand books, with all profits raised going to the charity's human rights work. 10am-4pm

QUEER, THERE AND EVERYWHERE: Granary Square's LGBTQ+ museum Queer Britain hosts drag performers Orlando and Eugène Delacroissant, and experts from The National Archives to explore LGBTQ+ lives in the 1921 census. Learn how people did — or did not — record their lives, and how they chose to have their identities represented. FREE, 1pm/3pm

FOLK FESTIVAL: The Nest Collective's one-day festival, Magpie's Nest, celebrates folk and roots music from around the world. Wander between two different stages at Grand Junction in Paddington, enjoying live music from the likes of The Jackie Oates Trio, Emmanuela Yogolelo, Anna Mudeka, Luca Rossi, Fred Hills Trio, Maja Bugge and Anna Ling. 3pm-10.30pm

LONDON CHAMBER ORCHESTRA: Searcys at 116 Pall Mall teams up with the London Chamber Orchestra for a special concert, featuring UK jazz trumpeter Pete Horsfall celebrating the music of the legendary musician Louis Armstrong. There's also the option of tucking into afternoon tea at the venue before the performance. 4pm afternoon tea/6pm concert

THE BEE: Set in a future in which the arts have fallen into the hands of big corporations and AI-generated storytelling, The Bee - An Immersive Experience, at Etcetera Theatre Club in Camden, is a dark comedy about where human creativity could be headed. 8pm-9pm

2022 WORLD CUP: It's not often you can watch a World Cup match beneath twinkling Christmas lights, but that's the situation this year, as the action kicks off today. Plenty of pubs, bars and other venues are screening matches here in the capital — take a look at our guide to where to watch the World Cup in London, and get booking, as many venues are selling out already. Here's hoping it's coming ho-ho-home. 20 November-18 December

MIDCENTURY MODERN: Looking to spruce up your home? Interiors show the Midcentury Modern returns to Dulwich College, which has furniture, ceramics, glassware, industrial, vintage posters, art, lighting, fabrics, rugs and more available to buy from 85 different dealers and designers. Prices range from £10-£10,000 so there's something for all budgets. 10am-4pm

STRING QUARTET: Start your Sunday to the strains of Beethoven and Haydn, as the Elias String Quartet take to the stage at Wigmore Hall. The Sunday show includes a free coffee, or —if you're so inclined — sherry. 11.30am

WOMEN'S DERBY: The World Cup begins today, but all eyes are on the women's teams for the South London derby, which sees Crystal Palace Women take on Charlton Athletic at Selhurst Park. Tickets are just £10 for adults, £5 for over-65s, or free for kids. Bargain! 2pm

COCKTAIL MASTERCLASS: Sweeties, the 10th floor cocktail bar at The Standard, London, hosts a 90-minute cocktail masterclass. Head mixologist Jack Sotti teaches you how to make three of the bars's most popular cocktails; Frothy Boi, Pick Me Up, and Love & Happiness. Ticket also includes a welcome drink. 2pm

ANTI-ANTI-ANTIFOLK: No we didn't fall asleep at the keyboard — that really is the name of this weird and wonderful mini music festival at Windmill Brixton, featuring 10 off-the-wall acts over nine hours. Performers include Gary Paradiso & His Peccadilloes, Extradition Order, and David Cronenberg's Wife. From 3pm

As the World Cup starts this week (see Sunday), here's a footballing plaque commemorating a remarkable player of days gone by. As the plaque relates, Edgar Kail was the last amateur to play for the England men's team. The Dulwich Hamlet forward gained just three caps in 1929, but managed to score two goals during his brief run. Kail might be a largely forgotten player to the wider world, but he remains a hero in SE22. His plaque is displayed prominently at the entrance to Dulwich Hamlet's ground, which is also approached by Edgar Kail way. Altogether now: "Edgar Kail in my heart, Keep me Dulwich, Edgar Kail in my heart I pray!"

The Ealing Charity Christmas Card Shop is back! The much-loved store pops up every yuletide, offering a huge range of cards while raising funds for good causes. While charity card shops aren't exactly rare, this one is a bit special. Amazingly, it's now in its 38th festive season, having raised almost £1 million for good causes.

The store can be found inside the Church of Christ the Saviour, New Broadway. Proceeds go to 24 different charities and, because its staffed by volunteers, that equates to 100% of sales. Open 10-4pm Mondays to Saturdays until 19 December.